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…Overheard conversations in the run up to Christmas…
“It’s the Christmas office party next week. What d’ya think I should wear?” – “I’d go for something smart and plain…keep up business appearances.”
“Mum, its Christmas jumper day at school next week.” – “well, we’ll find you something nice and tasteful to wear, dear.”
“I’ve no idea what to get crazy-cousin-Chris for Christmas this year.” – “He seemed to like those grey socks you gave him last year.”
…NAAAH!!! Only joking! You would categorically never, ever…ever hear any of the above conversations (at least not from anyone vaguely worth knowing!). And why is that? Simple, because those conversations are boring and have totally missed the point of Christmas and the now Traditional As Turkey Christmas Jumper. The whole point of our well-loved Christmas knit, its whole raison d’être, is to be FUN, and therefore also frequently FUNNY.
If your selection criteria for your Christmas jumper is that it makes you look ‘sexy’, ‘reem’, or ‘sophisticated’, then you need our help in resetting your Christmas knit-o-meter. There’s a whole 11 months of the year when dressing cool gets you cred, and then there’s Christmas-jumper-ember (aka December) when dressing funny wins points. And in our (fairly expert) opinion, when it comes to Christmas jumpers, the funnier, the better. Enter into the spirit of the Crimbo knit – let it bring you and others festive happiness by making folk laugh.
You’ll be spoilt for a gag-tastic choice on the jumper front this year … depending on what makes you smile and who you’re hanging out with from gentle, good-natured Christmas humour that’s suitable for Christmas dinner with Gran to more slap-stick comedy that’ll be sure to get a good laugh from the lads in the pub.
And if you can’t decide on your funny Christmas jumper for this festive season, why not take things a step further and just wear an inflatable turkey suit? We can’t think of anything much funnier than that!
So whether you want the year’s best meme or an inflatable turkey suit (stranger things have happened), you’ll find it here. There’s plenty to choose from too, on a wide scale of funny; from a chuckle from nan to roaring laughter from the boys at the pub – there’s humour to be had for all. Christmas jumpers are fun – so make your jumper funny this year and be more jolly than the big guy himself.
Xmas bod funny jumper from Boohoo
Boohoo's version of the joke body, printed on.
Ho Ho Hold my beer
Have a holly jolly Christmas with this fun festive sweatshirt. Featuring a grey ‘ho ho hold my beer’ Santa graphic on front, long sleeves and a classic crew neck.
Funny 3D Christmas jumper from Amazon
Soft green and red Christmas baubles (pom poms). Thick and warm knitted jumper. Great VFM and should last for years
“The Grinch” design Christmas jumper
“The Grinch” design festive jumper from Numskull. Officail Grinch merch featuring the most Bah Humbug of Dr Seusss’s characters. 100% knitted, usual sizes, stocked on Amazon
“Christmas Jumper” slogan festive sweatshirt
Relaxed fit Christmas sweatshirt with a pretty much-to-the-point message. Very popular jumper on Amazon. Get involved! (Available in Green and Red)
Sloth design funny Christmas jumper
Slow down and take it easy in this fab ugly Christmas sweater on Amazon. Knitted acrylic with Sloth design and snowflakes.
Pole dancer rude Christmas jumper
‘cos I’m sexy and you snow it! Pole dancing reindeer available in red or navy. More funny than rude, knitted Christmas sweatshirt.
“Beam me up Santa” design Star Trek geek jumper
Official Star Trek merch is available on the Amazon website. Live long and prosper with this geek knitted Christmas jumper.
Sleigh slogan funny Christmas jumper
Sleigh slogan women’s jumper from Boohoo. Acrylic, crew neck, long-sleeve. Available in white and pink, red and white, pink and red designs.
Matching ugly Christmas sweaters
Get your spandex on! (85% with 15% cotton) lycra type material. These super ugly Christmas jumpers can be worn to match. Hunky Mr. Santa with a red tie and cardigan design and, matching Mrs. Santa with bra and cardigan design.
Naked funny christmas jumper
Ugly Christmas unisex sweater on Amazon.
“Merry Christmas You Filthy Animal” !
Funny Christmas jumper in white, red, green and black. Scoop neckline. Standard and Plus sizes available.
Tinsel tits rude jumper
“Tinsel tits” design Christmas jumper on a base colour of pink, lilac or white. Fair Isle design with oh-so-subtle detail.
Up to Snow Good matching Christmas jumpers
“Up to snow good” design jumpers on the Boohoo website. Men’s and Women’s designs. Wear them out and about on your own or match with your bestie.
Get stuffed funny Christmas jumper
Get “stuffed” this Christmas. If you’re lucky enough to find a turkey to cook in this post-Brexit apocalypse, make sure to wear this jumper and look like a right turkey.
Funny Tesco Everyday jumper
Everyday value design Tesco jumper printed on heavy unisex sweatshirt. Different colours and funny designs to choose from on available on Etsy.
“I’m here for the food” design Christmas jumpers
Whether it’s turkey or roasties that tickle your fancy, this sweatshirt will cut out the small talk and let everyone know your priorities! This “I’m Only Here For The Food”, Christmas Jumper from Rock On Ruby is perfect for the festive season! A funny, slogan christmas sweater with a hand printed design.
Boris Johnson Funny Christmas Jumper
“Celebrate Christmas, Don’t Celebrate Christmas.” … make your mind up Boris funny Christmas jumper
“Make Christmas Great Again” Donald trump design Christmas jumper
Lets make “Christmas Great Again” …. oh yeah. Donald Trump themed sweatshirt.
There’s a Cookie in This Oven
Are you expecting this Christmas? Perhaps you’re expecting twins. Range of funny unisex maternity Christmas sweatshirts.
Inflatable Santa Costume
Get extra festive this year with an inflatable Santa costume. This battery powered suit inflates in seconds but the fun lasts all Christmas.
Cheeky Santa Jumper
Spread the festive cheer with this cheeky Santa jumper. This year father Christmas is asking “where my hos at?”.
Inflatable Turkey Costume
Get extra festive this year with an inflatable Turkey costume. This battery powered suit inflates in seconds but the fun lasts all Christmas.
Buddy the Elf Christmas Jumper
The best way to spread Christmas cheer is to sing loud for all to hear – or wear this Buddy the elf Christmas jumper.
Winner Winner Christmas Dinner Jumper
Get ready to tackle that turkey in style with the winner winner Christmas dinner jumper from ASOS. Tis’ the season to indulge after all…
Jeremy Corbyn Christmas Jumper
Politics never rests – spend the festive season snug in a Jeremy Corbyn Christmas jumper. The ultimate conversation starter this Christmas.
Christmas Elf Blazer
For those who like to be festive and smart this season, the Christmas elf blazer is the perfect addition to your yuletide wardrobe.
Winner Winner, Christmas Dinner!
Get ready to tackle that turkey in style with the winner winner Christmas dinner jumper from ASOS. Tis’ the season to indulge after all…
Don’t Be A Slacker Pull A Cracker Christmas Sweatshirt
Crackers, and a small accusation of laziness.
“I just like to smile. Smiling’s my favorite” – Elf movie jumper
View Buddy Elf themes Christmas Jumpers on the Etsy website
Kiss me on the mistletoe design jumper
Mistletoe, with instructions attached.
“Jerry Christmas” design Jeremy Corbyn design sweatshirt
“Jerry Christmas” slogan sweatshirt on Amazon.
Christmas means Christmas Brexit design jumper
Brighten up your Christmas and bring a little more joy and cheer to the season! “Christmas Means Christmas” Theresa May festive jumper.
Happy Slothy Xmas sweatshirt
A sloth, which is the correct animal for the twenty-seventh of December.
I’ve been naughty, I’ve been nice twin jumper
Can’t decide what to wear or where to go? Share a jumper with your bestie… now you can go everywhere together.
Santa and elf twin jumper
Santa and elf, which settles the hierarchy early.
Super fly Santa
Santa, superfly, enjoying his December.
All the beers belong to me
A claim staked early, across the chest.
Let’s Make Out!
Direct. The mistletoe is doing nothing here.
Trump jumper
Make Christmas great again with Amazon
Gin-tastic Jumpers
Get in the Christmas spirit with these Gin themed novelty jumpers! Shop Not on the High Street for the perfect gift for any gin lover.
The Ting goes pap-pap-pap Christmas jumper
A lyric, knitted. If you know, you know, and if you do not, you will be told.
Salt Bae – get your salt on
A meme, preserved in knitwear, long after the moment passed.
“Reinbeers” funny mens Christmas jumper
Reinbeers. You saw it coming and bought it anyway.
“Yule do” men’s Christmas jumper
Yule do. Faint praise, knitted.
“Hands off my puds”
Another defence of the pudding, issued pre-emptively.
Funny faux-naked Christmas attire
Looks like far less than you are wearing. Entirely the point.
“Make Christmas Great Again” – Donald Trump Jumper
A slogan borrowed and repointed at the season.